


Before The Bad Wolf

by Itsuptomenow



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Children, Drama & Romance, Eventual Romance, F/M, Multiple Doctors (Doctor Who), POV First Person
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-23
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-08-06 07:40:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16384010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Itsuptomenow/pseuds/Itsuptomenow
Summary: Liv recounts her tales with the Doctor and how she eventually fell in love with him. (First person point of view)





	1. The Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry again, I have horrible ADD and can't seem to focus on my other stories so I started another one >.<

I knew the Doctor, right after the war. I'm still not sure I fully understand what happened. He didn't like to talk about it. Any time it was brought up, he'd get this look in his eyes. A look full of sorrow, regret, anger. So many complex emotions I don't think my human brain could ever fully comprehend it.

He was hesitant to travel with me. I could tell he was desperate to be alone. But once I realized what he had been through, I knew it wasn't safe for him to be alone with his thoughts. His rage would bubble out sometimes. Never directed at me. He would always apologize after. I could tell he felt like he was weighing his burdens on me. I always tried to explain I didn't mind. The truth was I loved the Doctor. More than I'd ever loved anyone else in my life. But he wasn't human. And he'd never truly be mine.

I remember the day we met. It was my first day as a nurse. I was 22 years old. I was standing outside the hospital, near a rear entrance, on my lunch break. I saw him from across the yard. He looked disheveled and in desperate need of a shower. His clothes were torn and his face was spattered with dirt and blood. He cautiously approached me as I continued to stare.

“Excuse me, miss, I think I'm in need of some medical attention.” He said in a hushed tone. His accent seemed distinctly Northern, but I could tell he wasn't from there.

I began to point towards the entrance for the emergency department, but he shook his head.

“I need this handled by someone I can trust. Can you help me?”

“Me?” I said in a shaky voice.

He looked down, shook his head, and looked back at me with a small smile.

“I don't see anyone else around, love.”

“I...it's only my first day…” I stammered.

“What better time then now to learn something new?”

I swallowed hard and nodded.

“Follow me.”

He held out his hand and I took it. His skin was considerably colder than my own. Colder than any other human's I had felt.

“Sir, are you feeling alright?”

He turned back to look at me. That's when I first saw it, that pained look in his eyes.

“No.” was all he said as we continued to journey further from the hospital.

My heart was beating hard in my chest and my mind was racing. Who was this man and where was he taking me? Was I foolish to have agreed to help him?

Several minutes passed before we reached a blue police box abandoned down a deserted alley.

“Wha…” I began to speak, but he cut me off.

“I need you to promise me something.” He said as he turned to me.

I searched his face for some sort of emotion, but it was hard to read. He stared at me intensely.

“Okay.” I said flatly.

“What you're about to see and learn, it stays between us, alright?”

His eyes swept my face. My brow crinkled with concern.

“What's going on?”

“I promise I'll tell you everything, but I need your word first.”

My eyes darted from his face, to the blue box behind him, back to his face again.

“I promise.” The words left my mouth before I could take in their full meaning.

He searched my face again before nodding. He turned to the police box, pulled a key from his pocket, and began to unlock it.

Slowly, he pushed the door open and began to make his way inside. I stood there frozen.

“Coming, love?” I heard his voice from within the box.

I made a tentative step forward, bracing myself in the door frame. When my eyes adjusted from the light change, and I fully entered the box, I could see that it was ginormous inside. The room I had entered was at least five times, if not larger than the outside of the box should have allowed for. In the center of the room was a round, dashboard looking thing with many switches and buttons. From it was a circular glass tube that shot up to the ceiling. It was glowing a sea foam green. The walls were rounded, despite the exterior of the police box being completely rectangular. They were illuminated by dim, yellow lights. It almost felt like the room had a pulse. I could feel it vibrating.

I stared for a long time, completely speechless. It wasn’t until his voice broke through my trance, that I realized my mouth was hanging open.

“I know it’s a lot to take in. This is my TARDIS.”

When I looked over to him, he was stripping off his scarf and coat. Layer by layer he removed his clothes until he was in just his trousers. He didn’t appear to have any injuries. Or at least there were no visible bruises.

“I’m sorry, what did you say?”

“TARDIS. It stands for Time And Relative Dimension In Space.”

He must have been able to tell by my face that I was beyond confused. He chuckled to himself and made his way towards me. He stopped about a foot away and turned towards the center console.

“It’s a space ship. Well...a time and space ship.”

“Wait...what do you mean? Like, it can travel back in time?”  
  
“And forward too, if ya like.” He turned back to look at me.

“You’re joking, right?”

He smiled and then looked up and around the room.

“You tell me.”

I followed his gaze for a moment. I realized it seemed insane, but the damn thing was bigger on the inside. It couldn’t be that far fetched, that somehow, it was also a time and space machine.

When my eyes made their way back to his form, he was looking intensely at me. I cleared my throat before speaking again.

“So, you’re a space traveler? Does that mean you’re an alien?”

“Yes.” He spoke quietly.

“But you look human.”

“On the outside, maybe. My race does appear humanoid.”

“How do I know you’re not just making that up?”

“Come here.”

He motioned with his hand and I cautiously closed the distance between us. He took my hand into his before placing it onto the left side of his chest.

“Your heart is beating rather fast.”

He smiled and gently nodded. He then moved my hand to the right side of his chest. There was a distinct and separate heart beat. My mouth fell open again. I looked deep into his pale blue eyes.

“Yo...you have two hearts?” It came out as more of a statement than a question, but I was completely bewildered.

“Do you believe me now?” He reached up with his free hand and gently pushed my chin so that my mouth shut.

“Where are you from?” I asked as I nodded.

Slowly he released my hand and turned back towards the console.

“Gallifrey.”

“Where is that?”

“Far far away.”

“What’s it like there?”

He smiled for a moment. But as he started to speak, that haunted look washed over his face.

“It was beautiful. Unlike anything you could possibly imagine. The sky was blue during the day, but orange at night. There were silver trees and red grass.”

“It sounds lovely, but you said ‘was beautiful.’”

“Yes,” he paused for a moment, his hands running along the edge of the console, “it’s gone now.”

“Gone? What happened?” I felt my words get stuck in my throat. I suddenly felt irrationally emotional.

“I’d rather not talk about it, if that’s okay.”

“Okay.” I replied and reached out to place comforting hand on his arm.

He finally smiled again.

“Wait, I thought you needed me for medical attention,” I stepped back from him, “You don’t look injured.”

“Ah,” He laughed, “The perks of being a Time Lord.”

“What do you mean?”

“My people, when we become severely injured, we can regenerate. All of the cells in our bodies change and heal and we become a new person. I didn’t look like this a few hours ago.”

I remained quiet for a moment. I was still trying to process everything I had just learned in the past fifteen minutes. I was standing inside of a space ship-time machine hybrid, that was smaller on the outside and shaped like a police box. I was talking to an alien, who looked very much like a regular human male, who claims he completely changed bodies. I took in a deep breath and let it out slowly.

“What happened that caused you to ‘regenerate’?”

He grew quiet again.

“Sir?”

“Please, call me The Doctor, Doctor for short.”

“You’re name is ‘The Doctor’?”

He let out a sigh.

“Maybe this was a bad idea.” He whispered, barely loud enough for me to hear, shaking his head.

“I’m sorry. It’s just, I was so nervous about today being my first day as a nurse, and then next thing I knew I was standing inside a space ship with a humanoid alien. It’s just... a lot to take in.”

He looked at me for a moment.

“No, I’m sorry,” he started, “I told myself I wasn’t going to do this again. But for some reason when I saw you, I felt like I needed to bring you here.”

“Do what again?”

He rubbed his face with his large, rough hands.

“Sometimes I travel with a companion. For whatever reason they always end up being human. But I’ve just come from doing one of the worst things I’ve ever had to do, and I wanted to be alone for a while. However my TARDIS had other plans and forcefully landed on earth, here."

He took in a deep breath.

“I ended up finding my way to the hospital and saw you sitting outside. I don’t know what it was, but something told me you would understand all this,” He motioned to the interior of the TARDIS and then pointed to himself, "Understand me."

“I’m not sure I do, but… but I want to.”

He smiled and nodded.

“I’m glad. Now, we should probably start with some basics. First, I seem to have forgotten your name in all this.”

“I haven’t told you yet. My name is Liv.”

“Fantastic! That’s a great name. Next on the agenda, I need to find some new clothes. Would you mind waiting here?”

“Sure.”

“Just don’t touch anything. She doesn’t like strangers messing with the controls.”

“She?”

He smirked and looked up at the TARDIS console before disappearing into another part of the ship.

That was the first of many days we spent together. I think about the day almost every day. Sometimes I wish I could go back to the beginning. The fresh excitement that filled me once I realized my entire life was going to change. If only I had known the pain that would follow with it. The Doctor is an amazing character. You can get so easily swept up in him before you realize how far you’ll fall afterwards.


	2. In Harm's Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor warned Liv of the dangers of traveling with him, but will he regret bringing her along?

After that first day together, The Doctor asked me to travel with him. He took the time to explain to me the risks I was agreeing to. I agreed to them anyway. I was young and my life had thus far been uneventful. The Doctor has an appeal to him. It’s like an invisible tether pulling you in.

That first night he had settled on a new wardrobe. He explained to me that each time he changed bodies, he also changed styles. For our first adventure together he had dressed in a blue v-neck jumper with a leather jacket.

“How do I look?” He asked.

I couldn’t help, but smile.

“What?,” He glanced down at his outfit, “Is it silly?”

“No, no. You look...handsome.”

“Really?” He smoothed the wrinkles out of his jumper with his hands and smiled to himself.

He had taken me to a planet, I can’t remember the name of it. I had told him when I agreed to travel with him that I had no interest in traveling through time.

“I don’t feel comfortable with that.” I had explained.  
  
“Whatever you wish.”

The planet we ended up on had a beautiful beach. The sand was a pale rosy pink. The water was a mossy green. I wanted to go swimming, but The Doctor caught my arm.

“The water is too hot. It’ll burn you alive.”

I remember the rush I felt when he told me ‘no’. Being young and naive meant wanting to do dangerous things. I think that’s a big reason why I agreed to travel with him in the first place. Even just being around him was a rush. He gave off this energy I can’t explain. I always felt intoxicated.

As we stood on the beach, looking out towards the horizon, a strangely warm wind swept past us. I felt all my nerve endings tingle. I noticed out of the corner of my eye he was watching me. Studying my reactions. Sometimes I had wondered if he could hear my thoughts.

I smiled to myself, hoping he would notice. He finally turned away looking back out over the water. I turned my head slightly, just enough to see that he was smiling as well.

 

That was the first of so many planets we visited over the earth year we spent together. When I put it that way, it seems like such a short time. But every new day felt like a million years with him.

It wasn’t long before I realized my romantic feelings for him. I got the feeling that it was some how inevitable if you spent enough time with the Doctor. He was charismatic, charming, loyal. So many qualities people seek out in their partners. I had wonder if he ever caught me staring. Sometimes on the TARDIS, if he was tinkering around with things, I would just stare. Occasionally I wouldn’t even realize I was doing it. The way he moved around console was hypnotizing. It was like he was dancing. His moves were deliberate and smooth.

When he’d talk to me, explaining about the planet we were going to, or the aliens we might encounter, or the possible dangers that lay ahead, I would get lost in his blue eyes. He definitely had noticed that. More than a few times he’d have to snap his fingers to get my attention.

“Sorry, what were you saying?” I’d always reply.

He would laugh to himself before explaining again. I would smile and do my best to concentrate on his words.

I spent a good chunk of our time together wondering if he could ever love me back. I know he wasn’t human, but I didn’t care. I had even worked up the courage to ask him if Timelords had ever had romantic relationships with humans.

“It has happened in the past. Why do you ask?”  
  
“Just curious. Time Lords are so human-like, I had just assumed it would probably happened.”  
  
I think I knew in that moment he knew my true intentions, but he never expressed it if he did.

 

To this day I can still remember the day I finally found out The Doctor’s true feelings for me. It’s a day I’ll never forget.

We were running from some enemy on some planet I can’t remember. It was cold and the snow was made of glass shards. I was bundled up and had thick soled boots on. Lasers were being fired at us and small explosions were happening on all sides. The Doctor was ahead of me, but he kept looking back to make sure I was still there. I could see the concern in his eyes. He always felt guilty when he dragged me into trouble. This was definitely the worst it had ever been. Usually he was good at talking his way out of bad situations. But these aliens weren’t having it, and they wanted blood.

We were almost back to the TARDIS when a sudden explosion on my left threw me off balance. My body flung to the right, into a pile of the sharp glass snow. Luckily I instincually threw my hands up infront of my face. The coat and my clothes absorbed most of the damage from the snow.

"LIV!" I heard The Doctor shout.

Before I had any real time to think or react, I felt his strong hand on my arm pulling me back up.

“I've got you.” His deep voice said, but it was muffled. There was so much going on I couldn't separate all the different sounds. He hoisted me over his shoulder and started running again.

Finally we made it into the TARDIS. The Doctor gently set me down before racing to the console, flipping multiple switches and pressing buttons, until the TARDIS started to wheeze and I could feel her begin to take off.

In the few moments we had been inside the ship, my brain finally started to take everything in. There was a loud, painful ringing in my left ear from the explosion. I looked down at my hands and there were hundreds of small cuts beginning to bleed. My jaw ached and I could feel my side was already starting to bruise. That’s when I finally felt it, that warm slick feeling running down my neck. I put my fingers to it and when I pulled them away they were covered in blood.

“Doctor.” I managed squeak out, looking over to him.

He turned and met my gaze. He must have noticed the blood that had started to run more freely from my neck because I had never seen him look so terrified. In a second he was at my side, placing his hand roughly over the gash.

"I've got you, everything is going to be okay." But I could hear in his voice he didn't completely believe his own words.

My eyes met his once more. There was an intense sadness behind them, like he had already lost too much. Had he been there when his planet was destroyed? That was the last thought to race through my head before everything went black. For moment, I thought I could hear him calling out my name. But it sounded like he was light years away.


	3. Be Still My Heart

I woke up sometime later, in the bed I always slept in. The room was dark, but I could make out the faint silhouette of a person sitting on the edge of the bed. I could feel his weight pushing down into the mattress.

“Doc...” I tried to get out, but my throat was dry.

His weight shifted and he gently placed a finger to my lips.

“Save your strength, love. Get some rest.”

He moved his hand to cup my cheek. I nodded my head in response and closed my eyes again.

I had no idea how long it had been when I woke again, but the Doctor was no longer in the room. I pulled the blankets tight around me and let out a long breath. I laid in the bed for a few minutes accessing how I was feeling. I felt a bit groggy, the way you do when you get way more sleep than you actually needed. The hearing in my left ear still seemed a bit off, but the loud ringing was gone. My side was aching and my neck was stiff. That’s when I remembered the wound on my neck. My hand shot up to it, but quickly found that it was completely healed.

I slowly began to sit up, a sharp pain ran down my side. I grabbed a blanket, draping it over my shoulders, and carefully made my way out of the room. The journey from my bedroom to the console room felt a lot longer than it normally would. My head felt heavy and I had to focus harder than usual. When I finally made it there, the Doctor was tinkering away like usual, quietly whispering to the TARDIS. He turned to greet me as if he could feel my presence enter the room.

“You should still be in bed.” His voice was low and stern, but with a hint of caring behind it.  
  
“What happened?” My voice came out raspy.

“Here.” The Doctor came towards me, gripping my arm gently, and leading me to the stairs and sitting me down. He left the room for a moment and returned with a glass of water.  
  
“Drink up.” He handed me the glass and took a seat next to me.

I finished the water off within a few gulps. I hadn’t realize how thirsty I was.

“Now,” I said placing the glass down, “start talking.”

He rubbed his face and sighed.

“Do you remember, we were being attacked?”

I shook my head yes.

“You got hurt. It was worse than I thought. When we got back to the TARDIS, you fainted. You had a pretty deep wound in your neck. For a moment, I thought...” His voice cracked before he broke off.

I looked over to him and for a minute his gaze met mine. I saw a vulnerability behind them that I had never seen before. He shook his head and turned away.

“But my neck is healed now. How?”

“I had a secret stash of some nanogenes I encountered not too long ago. I was able to get them out in time before it was too late.”  
  
“Hold on, nanogenes?”

“They’re sub-atomic robots that can heal wounds.”

A strange silence fell between us for a while.

“Thank you.” I finally managed to get out.

“Of course.” The Doctor turned to face me again.

He placed his arm around me and gently pulled me towards him. I closed my eyes and rested my head against his shoulder.

“You’re warm.” He said in a hushed voice.

“And you’re cold.”

He chuckled softly.

“Doctor, was that really a close call?”  
  
“I believe it was.”

He turned his head towards mine and I felt his breath on my forehead. I lifted my head to look up into his eyes. That vulnerability from before was still there, but with a hint of something more. His hand made it’s way to my cheek. The coolness of his skin sent a shiver down my spine. I shut my eyes and before I knew it my lips were reaching out for his. To my surprise I felt his lips crash into mine. It was soft and loving. His thumb caressed my cheek which sent further shivers down my spine. He pulled away and breathed my name against my face,”Liv?.”

“Yes?” I said breathlessly.

“You really should get some more rest.”

I sighed and couldn’t help, but to smile. He pressed a kiss against my temple and helped me to my feet.

“We’ll stop off on Earth present day, and when you’re feeling a bit better we can take off again.”

“Sounds good.”

I gave him one last smile before making my way back to bed.


End file.
